Lileeva's birthday

Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers

Wednesday, 12 February 2014


Some days I think I'm a decent mum. Some days I think I'm the worst parent existing. Hell... what days?! Multiply times a single day...
No secret, I have temper issues, and damn isn't Lileeva pushing my limits daily! Sometimes even early afternoon I start clock-watching already, wishing my life away, hoping it was her bedtime. Constant tantrums about silly little things, non-stop whining of 'Mummy, mummy, mummy!'s for no reason and hitting/throwing things around, not taking 'No!' for an answer. So frustrating and draining.
Then the next minute she helps folding the laundry, tidies the room, throws her rubbish into the bin instead of leaving it around or even helps me rack my weights.
No wonder why parents go a little bit crazy. Having a child is fucking challenging.
I think I am selfish too. I demand my 'me time', I need my 'me time'.
Lately Lileeva started to have lay-ins the mornings and in return, dropping her afternoon naps. I tried to adjust, but simply could not. Not having that hour or two that breaks the day drives me nuts. (Probably has something to do with my training schedule and adrenaline levels too.)
With that said, I'm slowly realising that I'm probably not yet ready to have another child. I do want another one of course, but I worry I wouldn't be able to manage. Hmm...

Eating is still a nightmare, but getting slightly better. Potty training is on the hold until it gets warmer, especially since she's getting the cold.
And, tomorrow will be the first of many dreaded days; Nursery visit. I'm beyond nervous. On one hand, I would love to have a bit more of that above mentioned 'me time' which I could use well for studying and training. But, to be honest, I'm worried of letting her go. I know I need and I have to, but it makes me realise she's not my baby anymore, I won't have the full responsibility of her upbringing and her being in 'wrong hands' scares me shitless. (I'm aware of it being sheer paranoia, but a mother's job is to worry, right?!)
Fingers crossed this nursery is top notch.

Sunday, 9 February 2014


It isn't called 'terrible two's' for no reason.
It's like Lileeva is playing with my nerves daily, pushing my limits further and further with her cheeky little smile and is waiting when am I going to give up.
The tantrums are getting worse and worse and the food misery is unbearable. I'm seriously dreading lunch- and dinner times, because she wouldn't eat cooked, 'normal' food, but demands biscuits, sweets and fruits.
I even stopped giving her treat like snacks throughout the day, between meals, only fruits and/or yoghurt. If she eats majority of her dinner, then she gets a cup of tea or hot chocolate and a slice of cake or biscuits before bed.
I hope this method starts to work very soon, because the lack of nutrients she takes in worries me a little.

Wednesday, 5 February 2014


I've met possibly one of the worst health visitors, ever.
It was Lileeva's 27 month check-up, and I thought it will involve us talking about my concerns as well as they give me a guide how to sort them, like at all the previous health checks.
I mentioned this lady that I'm a little worried about Lileeva's lack of speech, and how fussy she is when it comes to food. (She's practically vegan, by choice.) I asked numerous times whether or not these are issues, considering that she's been raised in a bilingual family, and her height and weight is absolutely fine, so are her activity levels. The health visitor kept repeating, if I wanted to, she could refer us to a speech therapist and/or to a dietitian, but wouldn't give a straight forward answer.
Fucking useless.
I'm still thinking about the speech therapy thing, but due to my studies I decided a dietitian would just be a waste of time.

I've also noticed (Again.) how polite and nice Lileeva can be, comparing to other children at her age. She likes to share, and not the sort of kid that pushes others out of the way etc. With that said, I am teaching her to stand up for herself when someone takes something off of her, and it doesn't mean she can't be a real nightmare. Mostly with me though, not with other kids haha!