Lileeva's birthday

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Tuesday 29 November 2011

161.

Got them done today. Both look a bit weird how my foot and Lee's neck are twisted, little bloody, red and swollen, but hey, what do you expect from a tattoo?! Love love love! So far this is my personal favourite. And wasn't even as painful as I imagined... (Can't really speak in Lee's name though.)

Friday 25 November 2011

160.

Here can be read how I gave birth. As been requested I've written a Hungarian version which can be found below the picture.

You hear from people that giving birth is something you always remember but still, tempt to lose all the details at the same time. Yeah right... And yes, it's right.
My story is a bit different. Let's say all my birth plans went out the window, but what can you do, eh?! If the little person inside you thinks different you just have to go with it.
(For the people's information whom do not normally read my blog; I was planning on an all natural water birth, preferably at home with Lee whom we had the same idea of not looking down below. Cause of my thyroid issue I wasn't able to have the home birth, but still was going to go for the anaesthetic free, water birth in the hospital.)
As I said below I had the sweep done on the Wednesday before, the 9th, three days after my due date. I've even written about feeling little period pains that night, but they were absolutely bearable, so I didn't think much of it. Must have been nothing to do with the pain, but the adrenaline keeping me awake that night. Either way, I couldn't sleep.
In fact, around 06am the following, Thursday morning I started to feel what I thought were real contractions. The lower bit of belly (Uterus.) hardened and softened around the baby every 3-4 minutes. Even though the time of the pains weren't 100% regular I called the hospital's delivery suit around 04pm that afternoon. They said, since my water hasn't yet broken I must be in false labour which prepares my body for the big work. They recommended to eat something, try and get some rest but stay active as well to help the baby move down. Also been said, in these cases the baby usually comes within the next 24 hours. By around midnight I got pretty upset, the contractions weren't regular enough to call it the 'real deal', but were constant.
Friday just past midnight Lee came home from work, after mentioning I'm not on the top emotionally, and well... We done the natural remedy of things. It did work though, by around 05am Friday morning my contractions got regular and quite painful, so I called the delivery suite again. They told me if it keeps up I shall go in, just in case. So that's what we done; Got all the bags together, called Lee's mum around 09am and went to the hospital. They examined me and told me I'm not at all dilated, so sent me home, saying the same thing, that it must be getting my body ready and so. Weird though, cause on Wednesday when I had the sweep done I was 1 cm dilated already, but as they said this closing up thing can happen sometimes... It seemed like though every time something 'went in' my pains got stronger. This time I could cry. I might even have, can't remember.
Mind that, it's Friday afternoon and I've been awake since Wednesday morning. Hello my biggest fear. I'm sure it's not just me feeling everything more painful when knackered, is it?!
Anyways, we went home, I pretty much laid in the bath all day, while Lee was worrying his pants off. I told him to go asleep cause there's no much point of him being awake. Bless him, he tried to help, giving me massage or just to cuddle me, but I couldn't bear his touch. Funny enough, I'm that person who begs for massage normally, so he kind of had a lucky few days. He then snuggled me, got the hot water bottle and some paracetamol ready, lit candles in the living room and tried to make me feel comfortable before going upstairs to bed, but by this point nothing helped. I was beyond tired, unbelievable upset of nothing happening and pissed off of the fact, that this baby of mine makes it so hard for me. I obviously couldn't sleep, was just staring the motives of the orange throw on the sofa, and strangled the pillow every times the contractions came.
Saturday morning it was when I had enough. Called the delivery suit again and screamed. Cried for help, begged them to perform a C section on me immediately cause I couldn't possibly handle it anymore. Bless the receptionist, she tried to calm me down but all she got was angry responses. And, while on the phone, it finally happened; Water started to trickle down my leg. She said to go in but promised nothing.
They took a sample of my water, nice clear ish fluid, examined me again (Only 2 cm! Baby's head still high up.) and sent me back home (Again!), saying that's that, since my water broke I considered to be in real labour, but still at the early stage so I shall call in when my contractions are 3-4 minutes apart and about a minute long. If this wasn't going to happen they would wanted me to go in the following, Sunday morning as all the water shall be gone by then, and there is a 24 hour 'infection' rule on the womb, so in this case they'd have to induce me.
So we went home again, Lee was counting the contractions for a few hours, then sent him to bed to have some rest and was doing it myself, while spent the day walking up and down in the living room, bouncing on my ball or standing under the shower. I was in so much agony, but every third minute, when the pain came I closed my eyes and was thinking of my baby wiggling herself down and getting closer to the big encounter. Was around midnight when I called the hospital and they told me to go in. Woke Lee, called our friend Bob, got the bags and we were on the way. The car ride was horrible, I couldn't bear any of the guys to talk or even to look at me, I just wanted to get over with this entire thing.
Arrived there just past midnight Sunday morning, but by then could hardly walk down the corridor. Was a queue in front of me and the receptionist didn't really seem to give a crap about me screaming, it was a random midwife walking past let the team know that I'm there in need of help. Still, it took them around an hour to get me a room and an other half (?) to get a doctor to examine me. Again! 3 cm... That's when I totally lost it. How can I be in labour for over 3 days, and my body doing nothing?! My baby clearly just playing up, sliding up and down whatever she feels like to do, giving me grief but nothing else is happening?!
The doctor who came to see me first was the same guy who done the sweep on Wednesday. I laughed and told him I hated him, and as he started he shall finish it too and get this baby out of me immediately. He said the baby has dropped down a little (Yay!) and he rather not perform a C section on me straight away, but put me on epidural and have a chat about things after it affected me, since I needed to be on it during a section anyway.
Getting the epidural put in wasn't as painful as I thought it would be, the local anaesthetic beforehand was, but was mainly hard keeping myself straight and still, in the same position while contractions came and went. Especially cause the midwife who supposed to help the doctor, was wandering in and out of the room, ain't got a clue what was she thinking... Apart from that, the drip put in my hand (Incorrectly just to say, bloody, and which from my hand swell to twice a size.) by the midwife was worse than getting a tube put in my spine. This was about 03am and the pain was entirely gone around 05-06am.
The morning came, I got put on a different kind of CTG machine which is basically a wire attached to the baby's head, cause she was moving around a lot and they kept losing track of her heartbeat. The morning staff has arrived, I got a really nice and young midwife, Lee was next to me pretty much all day  and since I couldn't feel much from wait down I could get a couple of hours rest as well. Just about time!
I still had water dripping out of me, but at least was dilating slowly. Ain't going to lie, I felt a little uncomfortable with having to have the catheter used on me and all that, but since the midwife was so friendly I could get over it. Still, I don't want to get old and be defenceless for years, this state for long must be horrible.
The doctors have explained they rather have me giving birth naturally cause I won't feel much anyway, maybe some pushing pains if that, but since they are monitoring my contractions they are able to tell me when to push. Perfect!
It was around 04pm when I got transferred to a bigger room and my midwife left to have her lunch break. It only supposed to be her helping me giving birth and she even said to Lee, if all went well he can be the one performing the actual birth. While she was away the doctor have popped in, a middle age woman, I told her it was time for my epidural top up cause alright that this gas & air is fun (Basically the same stuff they sell in balloons on parties, but I obviously just heard about it...), I'm in quite a bit of pain, but she wanted to examine me before. So lucky she did! I was fully dilated by then and my baby's head was half way down, so she requested to give her a push or two, to see if my baby was moving down with them. She was.
At 0415pm she explained how to push and when. I was confused, it happened way too quick and my pains weren't half as bad as in the past few days. All I could say looking at Lee and the doctor 'Is this us, having a baby? Now? Really?' but there was pushing time again.
I think I pushed through three, maybe four contractions. With the first one we got her head down lower; That's when her heart rate dropped drastically and way too quick, ain't going to lie, for a second thought the normally quick beeping I was listening to in the past 13 hours, going to stop. The buzzer went off and 6-8 people have ran in the room, doctors and midwives, shouting, grabbing my leg, twisting me around, placing me here and there, all very quick. Was scarily like an episode from ER, however I wasn't at all panicking cause I knew we can pull this together. In fact, I was quite amazed how all these people came to help only me, one person.
And I pushed. And they encouraged me. And I squeezed Lee's hand, who couldn't help, but looking what's going on down there. The lady didn't want to come, that was going down, so the doctor got the ventouse, a little vacuum device attached to the baby's head which they were pulling while I'm pushing. I would have preferred to have the forceps used really, I mean it grabs the baby's entire head not just the scalp, but the end of the day as long as it helps... So the doctor said, with the next push the bubba is going to be out, but she needed to snap me before (Here I got scared from the size of the scissors, but felt nothing at the end.) cause I already have tore a little. I asked if it was going to be just the head or the entire baby; She gave me a pity smile and said just the head. But it was the entire baby.
She came out nice and pink and tiny. It felt really weird, for a second you'd think your entire body will split in pieces, than the relief of feeling her body sliding out, than a little wrinkly crying thing on your stomach. I thought I won't shed a tear, but I did. I think Lee did as well, both of us laughing and crying at the same time. 0431pm.
The placenta has pretty much flew out of me, before the doctor even had the chance to put my girl on me. It wasn't even like the umbilical cord stretching and pulling it out, the cord was all saggy. By the sound of it I though it was my newborn has pooed herself with a big noise (It's quite common after birth.) but nah, it was the entire placenta, my body didn't need it anymore and threw it out. Lucky thing the doctor has some reflex and could catch it, if she waited another split second it would've hit her straight on the face. She said she never seen anything like this before.
Then, as someone who loses interest in a toy, stopped being nice or caring, stitched me up not so quickly but quite painfully, put me on a drip and left me there with Lee, the baby and some food.
Lee can handle gore but said the amount of blood came out of me was horrendous but 450 mls - 4.5 dls ain't too bad I reckon.
I ate finally, after days, the midwife showed how to latch my girl properly (No luck.), Lee's mum popped up to see us, then another midwife came, helped me up (Very weak legs.) and pushed all the remaining blood out of me, I had a shower, she put me in a wheelchair and transferred me to the maternity ward around 10pm, where I had to spend two painful days.
So that's how Lileeva Jean Rothwell-Vatai made her appearance, absolutely opposite of how I planned to have her. (But yes, I'm thankful for not choosing to stay home at the end, don't even want to think about what would have happened with her if I did. I was also close to have a blood transfusion after, but it's another story for another time.)


Szüléstörténet magyarul. Katt.

Saturday 19 November 2011

159.

We arrived on Sunday the 13th of November at 16:31 with 49 cm and 2870 g ~ 6 lbs 4 oz.

Wednesday 9 November 2011

158.

So these are the ones I'm wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggling her for. Breath in now breath out, hands up now hands down.
It felt more effective yesterday, but hey, fingers crossed.

157.

Another ridiculous day behind. I hate my hospital.
Had the appointment to see the consultant and to get the sweep done at 0920am, I've got seen at around 1040am. This time it was a really decent, young ish guy, I reckon gay. (The gayer the better. In my opinion anyway.) First of all he checked the baby's position and heart rate, which he found straight away! That's when I was like alright, finally a person who knows what he is doing.
Me and Lee both agreed on him doing the sweep, and he explained it should work within 24-48 hours... If it does. This sweep thing itslef wasn't one of my nicest experiences, but what else would one expect, after all it's all about someone touching your still inside, chillaxing baby's head... It says on my notes I was 1cm dilated already. Weird?! Ain't complaining though.
Then, because of my high blood pressure and not excellent, only O.K. urine he ordered me to get a blood test done straight after and go back for the results within a few hours. He told me if everything was alright they probably just going to send me home, but if they saw anything what would worry them, they'd induce me tonight straight away. This was around 1130am.
Went back for 0200pm to get my blood and urine result. And here's where all it started. First of all, had to wait for over half an hour on the boiling hot reception. For what, I don't know.
Then to be seated to a chair, to check the baby's heart rate. Only thing, the midwife forgot to put me on the CTG machine until 0325pm. Since I'm only supposed to be on it for about half an hour, it pissed me off. I could've been out of there by then already.
The doctor popped up every now and then, saying my blood results are good, she's just waiting for the urine test which should be in the system by 0350pm.
At 0420pm when the midwife said she's off home cause her swap has arrived I asked her to get me off of the machine finally, cause was bursting for a pee. Lileeva was pushing my bladder every now and then giving me grief, not to mention the little pains, but I'm still not sure what they were. I mean, I've only had breakfast at 0800am and couple of milkshakes for my heartburn, with going to the loo regularly so couldn't really be constipation. Or could it?!
While I was on CTG the doctor has been called away to do emergency C sections on the delivery suite, and even though the midwives have access to my files, they couldn't let me off, needing the doctor's approval. She finally came at 0500pm, just to let me know that everything is fine and I can go home. Do I even have to say that I knew this will happen?!
She ordered me a blood pressure test for Friday, which obviously can't be done at home cause our machine might not be good enough. Also having an appointment for next Wednesday to get me induced if Lileeva didn't came by then.
I hope she will come by then, I can't mentally be doing this wait around game again, pisses me off way too much.
Then after all this I quickly ran back down to the antenatal clinic to try and catch one of the (Only Wednesday practicing.) thyroid doctors to double check and push towards home birth again. Understand my point as easy as it is; Unnecessary tests all the time, cause no one believes me. I don't want this to happen while I'm actually giving birth, I want to do it in peace. I know they just want to make sure that everything is fine with both me and the baby but it's ridiculous. 8 hours of stress and waiting around for something I already knew; That me and my girl are absolutely fine!
Now here's another thing. A midwife I could talk to at the clinic was shocked by many points of my story; Firs of all that I was still there after this morning's appointment, then that the fact the obstetricians, home birth team and doctors are kept sending me to each other throughout my entire pregnancy without giving me explanations. So she did; I'd still be able to apply for home birth, but someone has to come out to do an assessment on our flat to see if it was acceptable, then they have to send this assessment to a team who decides about it all. Since it takes a while, they usually do this on or around week 34. Now cause I had the sweep done today I can go into labour pretty much any time from now on, therefor it's all pointless. Good that I kept fully informed, eh?! I finally left the building at 0520pm. Nice day, just as I planned. Not!
By the way my baby is legendary already! The midwife actually thought I moved the little CTG stickers on my belly cause after like 20 minutes she pretty much disappeared and her rates were hardly visible for the next half an hour or so. During this period there was a clearly visible lump on my right side, high up, very close to my boob haha!
Lee was with me all day, bless him. Since he works nights that means he came home after his 12 hours shift and managed the day through without even having a nap. We got home from the hospital past 0600pm so after 26 hours awake, he called his boss of missing out on his shift and went straight to bed.
I had a pretty bad sleep last night, but thought I'd stay awake for a while and write about all this.
Sitting in my usual position, my little big girl doesn't anymore feel like she is high up in my ribs, and counting in the past almost 3 hours, my pains are regular-irregular 5-7 minutes period pains. Wouldn't call them contractions since they aren't up in my womb, more likely the cervix area. It either has something to do with dilating or I'm constipating. Then again, every month while having my period it kind of feels like I'm constipating so...
Anyways, my friend said I shall try and sit in a hot bath for some time and watch what's happening. These pains either disappear or get stronger and regular, then so I'll be able to know whether or not it's the real deal. It probably isn't yet though.
Will give this bubba a little dance, a glass of prune juice (Just in case.) then a bath before bed. See what happens.

Tuesday 8 November 2011

156.

She was 4 days overdue with her twin boys and apparently a couple of days after this video has been taken she gave birth naturally. Bang tidy! I know what I'm doing tonight.

155.

Haha just remembered we have this printed out somewhere, all I have to do is it to stick it up on the wall.
Just in case...

154.

Here is a link about how beneficial natural child birth is, over a Cesarean section. It's all about the hormone which a C section it's not likely to be released in as big of a dose as would benefit the baby, make her bond easier and to start the milk flowing quicker. Oxytocin it is, the love hormone.
Now thinking about it I might be close to going to labour, since I'm feeling all snuggley towards Lee, like a little kitten haha! Might be something to do with the winter coming as well, I feel all loved up during this time of the year.
I don't feel much difference after passing my due date though, but to be honest I thought that's going to be the case and it will pass just as a normal preggers day.
Lileeva's moves are getting a bit more aggressive if I can say this, it's like she's pushing her head down stronger. Well... Sill not strong enough though; I don't feel her to be engaged and as soon as her pushes it down it's like she feels my muscles tighten up from the pain and she rather back up, pushing my bladder instead, not wanting to hurt me.
I reckon she'll be coming early morning as of she always active around 02-03am nowadays. Other thing is, I only feel her moving down when I'm sitting or laying, never when I'm walking or standing. Not sure why?!
These heading-down pains did worry me a little, especially cause no matter how hard I try I can't really relax my muscles, but I reckon it's more likely cause of the uncomfortable 'everything' feeling down there. I mean I have a quick shooting pain down there, bursting for a pee an inch or two above, and getting kicked just under the ribs at the same time. It's not bad, I rather call it weird.
Still kind of believe when it finally starts off for real, it won't be hurting as much. I imagine myself getting up from the sofa ('Damn I need a wee again!') and pop, there goes my water.
I can't wait to see her but I think my excitement only going to kick to 100% when the first contractions start. Simply cause I still found this entire thing unreal and still not sure it hit me yet! We are about to have a baby in literally any minute! It's something big and life changing which ain't happening every day to us.
(Message to the people calling me daily about 'Where is she? Did you give birth yet?' - Stop it! It doesn't help, you just annoy me to hell. Thank you.)

Monday 7 November 2011

153.

My week by week bump-volution. Meaning; Being utterly bored, trying to entertain myself until I pop this gorgeous little monster. Come on now girl, we are all waiting for you!

Sunday 6 November 2011

Friday 4 November 2011

151.

Been to the hospital today to see the midwife. I had to wait quite some time but it definitely worth it.
She spent about an hour with me, asking questions and answering to mines. She as well suggested to stay home as long as I can when I'm in labour. Given me the numbers to call when the time has come, and explained if neither me and the midwife on the phone weren't sure what's going down they might would want me to go in to the hospital, but if I'm not much dilated they'd just send me back home. Still, can't imagine how am I going to notice that I'm in labour?! Ah well...
She had exactly the same problem like the woman seen me the week before though; Couldn't find Lileeva to listen to her heart haha! This time I knew there were no problems, cause she might be quiet and shy during the day but is always fidgeting for long around bed time. Anyways, she ended up calling a doctor who brought the scan machine and found the little monster straight away. Weird though how neither of us could tell where she was, touching my bump. I mean it's big, and baby is big and fully baked too, all they could figure that she was head down (Still not engaged. Sigh.) but not the body...
Turns out she's mostly curled up on her side. We are kind of like side-to-side (If there is a back-to-back, there is a side-to-side too I assume. In my dictionary there is, anyway.), her head is below my tummy, her spine is along my right side and her bum is under my right boob, leaving her little legs and arms on my left side. (This made me realise how big she is!) Makes sense; That's where I feel the punches and kicks most of the times, while only feeling her little hiccups when laying on my right. The doctor said her position is perfect 'coming out' position and I have a good amount of water on the left side for her which means my placenta still works good. Yay!
I made an early appointment for next Wednesday the 9th to get the sweep done, I do hope it works pretty much straight away and can have her on Friday. (I know, I'm selfish with this date thing haha!)
If she won't be coming by next weekend either, I have to go back and do the induction procedure the week after... Fingers crossed there won't be need for that though.
I have everything ready, but still feel a little unprepared. Feels like I forgot something... I have my music sorted, have my oils mixed, even have a bag of snacks (Crisps, chocolate, lollipops, fruits, water and energy drinks. Prepared much?!) in the fridge ready to throw on top of the bag. All I have to do is double-triple check the hospital bags, and write a list to Lee what I need him to whack in them the very last minute, like slippers and toothbrush and stuff.
I can't wait to hold her finally, but looking at Lee, I think he is even more excited about meeting with her at last, he can't stop talking about her! Aww I love my family so much!

Tuesday 1 November 2011

150.

Lee done his Christmas shopping the other day and came back with outfits for Lileeva! He said he couldn't resist; I know what he means though, these baby clothes are just shouting at you to buy them! He knew he's going to do my head in with the 0-3 months sizing but he wants to see our little girl in them straight away.
Here they are, a full sheep outfit with a hood, and a three piece set of sheepy-prisony madness. Proper cute!


With today I only have 5 days until my due date. I'm still not feeling it, to be honest. Probably Sunday is just going to pass like every other pregnant days of mine.
I don't like bouncing on my ball yet, doesn't feel too comfortable, in fact gives me a little back ache, reckon it has something to do with the big boobs?! She doesn't feel like engaging either when I'm out and about walking, only pushes my bladder, making me wanting the loo every minute.
Keep wondering when and how she's going to make her appearance, whether I'm going to be indoors or out, whether it will start with my water breaking or contractions...
I just hope she does it by herself and not going to wait out that 2 extra weeks, otherwise I'm going to get cut up, and that wouldn't be good for either of us. Fingers crossed.