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Thursday, 1 September 2011


Went out to do some shopping in Primark this afternoon. Originally I was going to get a skirt, a T-shirt and some shabby pants for after labour. Obviously ended up not getting what I wanted, but lots of others. Even had a little peek on the baby section and got a massive baby blanket, white on one side, colorful on the other, lots of boy ish (The blue ones not the pink... Surprise.) bibs, and cute little socks. Yay. Only a few more stuff to go. My M&S nursing bras have arrived too; They look massive! They fit though, and are proper comfortable so can't complain.

Lee's mum, sister and niece popped over after too, was good to see Louise out and about. She's doing great now, and she looks so tiny, I'm jealous!
At one point Lou was asking what is the birthing ball for, cause hospital has them (She had two kids; She's been there, done that.) so we told her apart from rolling about on it during contractions, it's comfortable to sit on every now and then, takes the pressure off of my lower back. Lee then said it'll come handy at the first part of the labour since (Even though I won't be able to do the home birth thing) I definitely ain't no going in to hospital for that period. Lou was like -'Oh yeah you bloody well will be running to the hospital after the first pain, cause you're going to freak out, trust me.'... Thought she was still talking to Lee, knowing her brother or some shit, she wasn't even looking at me so it took me about a good half a minute to realise she meant these words for me.
I was way too shocked to be furious! What? Why? How dare? I mean... Seriously?! I'm sure she didn't mean it on a bad way, but it hurts and pisses me off so much, especially cause of what I'm going through right now.
It might just be me, and the way I got raised (And how I will raise my girl, by the way.), but if I have something to say I try and not to make it sound negative, or like I'm talking down on someone (You know the saying; Think twice before you say something.), or even though I don't agree with something I rather ask the other person's point of view, and try and understand why she thinks it that way, then tell my own experiences and warn her that most probably yes, she will freak out from the pain, and yes, she will be wanting to go into the hospital straight away. Attitude!
She most probably doesn't even know the background story behind my plan, so that's fair enough, but she didn't even look interested in it. I reckon she -as like most other people- think that I don't even have an idea of how cruel and painful it's going to be. Yeah, right, I ain't got a clue, cause I've never before given birth, but I do not expect it to be happy-happy joy-joy, and as much as I'm looking forward to suffer it through, I know it will have it's ups and downs. (Yes, I am looking forward to it, I think it's something every woman has to experience to be able to appreciate and celebrate the new little life. Going even further; I don't really see why do everyone moan about the horrible pain?! I can't wait for my first contractions, I'll be more excited at the beginning than scared, knowing it's on, it's started, my life is soon to be changeed forever.)
Oh whatever. I've gotten so many spiteful comments or bullies in my entire life, if I did care about every single one of them, I would most probably be curled up crying in some dark corner, lonely and miserable.

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