I've been reading a Hungarian article about birth giving, in the view of being in a different state of mind in labour. Surprise, surprise.
Wouldn't say I didn't already know about it, just haven't yet done a research or seen written about it anywhere.
It talks about how important for women to be in an ideal environment during labour, and how intimate and private this process is for them. Most of them resemble this experience as making love, and let's be honest,- apart from a few extreme exceptions- neither of us would like to have sex in public and/or in front of unknowns. Studies showed, if they were in a place and/or among people they didn't feel comfortable, around couldn't just slow but could either stop their labour.
On the other hand, being in the individual ideal surrounding could not just make labour easier, less stressful but less painful too! Women need to feel absolutely safe, which helps them to relax and to focus 'inside' instead of the outside world. It apparently gives a rhythm to the actual birth giving, and makes women bear the pain easier, and even to relax and rest a little in between each contraction. Also, not just mums but dads found the bonding easier, with babies born this way.
Since everyone is different we can't really speak in generalities, so I speak about what do I think would be the best for me.
Luckily I learnt about myself that I can 'switch off' if it comes to pain. Not 100% of course, but I kind of know where to go in my head, and I'll take advantage on this when in labour. Weird, cause at the same time I can not meditate...
I told my mum straight away that I don't want her around on the big day, which is harsh I know, but I somehow felt she'd just disturb me. Even though I didn't really think about how important it is who's with me when I'm actually giving birth, it all makes sense now. It must have something to do with not at all thinking of and planning my labour, apart from the monthly fights with the doctors. Then again, that's the material part of it.
Started to be unsure about having a midwife in the same room when it's all going down, as well. I know it's necessary, and they've seen it all, I still dare the thought of having someone around I don't know or might won't like.
I would want to be in a paddling pool in our -then even smaller and friendly looking- living room, with only our little decor lamps and candles on, bang on the incense, and some minimal music to keep me pumped, but not to be too disturbing with it's highs and lows. Having Lee next to me and the midwife behind me, or somewhere I don't see and can easily forget about her.
Instead I'll be in the birthing center... Which is still better than a noisy ward, but...
But it's a massive, plastic, cold looking, white and blue room, way too hot temperature wise, has the computer in the corner, which the midwife will be typing away on, can't listen to music unless with earphones which I wouldn't want, and can forget about the incense which is the most calming add on for me. Not to mention all they've got, are white office lights on the ceiling. So much for ideal.
Anyways, I'll still try my best to run away from the outside world, and can only hope I won't be disturbed. And when I finally open my eyes after looking at Lee, I can look into my daughters big blue eyes straight away.
Tuesday, 11 October 2011 11:54
We agreed with Lee to call the hospital to find out details about the how and whys. Luckily I ended up speaking with a really nice and helpful midwife, who told me not to worry, they do have little lights but if I wanted I could even bring my own, just in case. They don't do candles and incenses but can bring essential oils, which I don't really use but will have a look into it. And music! Can listen to music out loud without earphones. She also said it's better if I brought my own towels and pillows for my own comfort, so might as well bring one of my big orange throws too, to make the room look warmer.
She also explained that since it's my first baby it could take quite some time til she pops her head out, so she recommends to just stay in touch with them on the phone, instead of going straight in.
That was my plan anyway. Yay, can't wait!